Antigone Cadmus

Oh, I guess it was just because you told me Anna was dead. Also: “Hammer Point One” Hendrix whispered. Anna’s tiny heart snapped. It made it sound as though he ...

Hey, Chocolate Writing Cat! Here as requested! “Courtney, this is going to be awesome! I still can’t believe that you actually got tickets!” When starting off a story, you shouldn't ...

Review numero dos: There was a book already on it. *Le gasp!* I'll cover this in your overall, but I just thought her reaction to this was a little overblown. ...

Thanks for all the feedback! I've edited it. --Sakura

May I suggest Pride and Prejudice?

Roseyyyy! Review number two! Jessica stirred when sunlight filtered Hmmm, now that I re-read this line, I think it would flow better as "Jessica stirred as ..." Jessica tapped her ...

Ah. Google did not lie to you; we simply have more then one kind of dollar bill! A Quick Guide to Currently Worthless (Darn Economy) American Currency $1 -- George ...

Sorry for the long wait, Maki-chan! Review part two: The poor defenseless man was dying on the cold and hard floor. Well, we already know he's dying. Use description instead. ...

I posted this on the essay as well so you can go back to my critique while editing. ^_^ :shock: That's how you were told to write it? Wow... Welllll, ...

To respond to your question: When introducing characters you're allowed some telling. Maybe when Elizabeth comes out of the study, a scene like this could play out... As I walked ...

Apology accepted. ^_^ YWS can definitely knock you down a few pegs when you first post, can't it? I'm still overly curious about this story, so I keep checking back ...

Well here goes.......*GASP*..... Firstly i used the word tendrils because i am trying to personify, yeah it's allowed, and streams implies a ridiculous amount of sweat which is just stupid. ...

The only problem with Joyce's feelings being put in is that your story would be switching to third person omnipotent, a voice that really bothers me. Voice/POV Third person limited ...

It wasn't a waste of time at all! You definitely have potential as a writer. When we criticize you, it means we like your piece. I see a lot of ...

No, there are several moments when you say he is scared. Chillll, dude. 1.) You asked for my critique 2.) It was just a hint... *hides* 3.) Showing not Telling ...